Beginning
As I walked throught the town, I knew something was different. I cannot explain it to you
or even to myself, to this very day. But in my inner being I knew.
I had tried for all this time to harden myself to the barbaric treatment of the so called
criminals, but there was something about seeing a human nailed to a cross that I found
difficult to witness. I had gone many times, but lately, I had tried to stay away. I knew many
deserved to die for their atrocious acts for one reason or another, and so I felt justified to
stand and jeer and mock them, but even though I may agree with the punishment, the
method still repulsed me.
The day I speak of here was very different from the beginning. I could feel in my bones
that this was not any ordinary day. I must admit, I had many misgivings concerning this
particular man from the start. As hard as I tried, I could not understand why I was so
attracted to him. He stirred up feelings in me that I did not even know existed. I quietly
resisted him because I was not ready to grapple with the many issues that surfaced. But
there they were, and because they would not go away, I knew that I had to begin to deal with
them one at a time.
The weeks prior I had often seen him and heard him speak. Inwardly I began to change
but outwardly my life seemed so much the same. And yet, my own family began to look at
me questionably and I often heard my name mentioned in a whisper, but when I
approached they suddenly became silent.
The crowds this particular day were heavy and there was much talk about his getting his
just dues. I heard some call him rabble rouser, blasphemer, demon, while others shouted
Messiah, deliverer, and God. I decided to hold firmly to my neutral ground until I learned
more. I was still not sure where he stood with me, or I with him.
As the day went on, I found myself following him as he carried the cross. I watched as
they drove the nails into his wrists feeling quezy at the sight. I saw the two others that were
hung on each side of him, and I suddenly shuddered for no apparent reason.
This man Jesus suddenly looked at all those around the cross as if he was seeking
someone in particular, and when his eyes saw his friend John, using the little strength that
he had left, he raised his head and gently said " Behold thy Mother". All that were there
knew that he had chosen John to care for his mother Mary from that day forward. All I could
think of then was; what manner of man would care enough at the moment of his death to
delegate the care of his mother to another. I was adequately impressed. It made me want
to find out more about this gentle man. And as time went on did.
When he spoke his body shook with fatigue and his weary head dropped to his chest. I
could see that he was near death and as his head slipped downward, our eyes met and I
suddenly knew. I knew who he was and what I meant to him. In this one flash of eternity I
knew, and as I heard him say " It is finished" I was suddenly blessedly aware that what he
had just finished was wonderfully just the beginning for all mankind.
